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Comments about ISTI
(Updated
9.25.02) It was with excitement and
anticipation that we read of the Interfaith Sexual Trauma Institute being
established in Anne d'Auray Thank you for the wonderful
hospitality of the Benedictine community at Jean Miller, founder, LINKUP I am a survivor of ritual abuse
and rape. I enjoy reading your
newsletter. Please keep sending
it. I have no money to pay for it
because I can't work at this time. I
am writing to say thank you. Victim, I am an Anglican priest and social
work manager. I am the child protection
advisor to the Anglican Bishop in this Province. Restoring the Soul of a Church is a
very helpful book, very moving, sensitive, and sensitizing as well as
thought-provoking and stimulating. The
Anglican Church in Rev Christopher
Chestle, Leigh-on-Sea, I am writing as a survivor of
clerical abuse. Restoring the Soul
of a Church is great. I hope some
of our bishops read it as they are still not really understanding our
hurt. I met another woman in our
parish who had a similar experience to me and it was the first time we both
felt really understood. It was another
step in our recovery and empowerment.
We hope to set up a support group for people like us and wondered if
you had any guidelines that would help us.
Your book was great and as I said I hope our bishops read it. Thank you for the real understanding that
hopped off the pages. Victim,
I was very excited to hear about ISTI.
I am a social worker with a private psychotherapy practice,
specializing in recovery from childhood sexual abuse. I am also a trained victim advocate for the
I spoke to you sometime ago about
how I was victimized by a Rabbi here in Shrra Reiss,
Chairman & CEO, CareerTrack, Boulder CO I am a Catholic priest and a victim
of sexual abuse. I have had a lot of
pain over the years struggling with this.
It has disturbed me to the extent that two years ago I quite the
priesthood particularly because I still continue to see priests abuse. I'd really appreciate it if you could send
me more information which could help me find the kind of help I desperately
need. Victim, I found Dr Mark Laaser very helpful
for both consultations and as a referral source. Whatever you decide, Roman, don't quit --
we need guys like you leading the charge.
To paraphrase what God said to Esther, "Who knows, maybe you were
brought to the Kingdom for such a task as this." Please count me as one of your encouragers.
Dave Carder,
Counseling Ministries, First Evangelical Free Church of Thank you so much for your work in
the area of sexual addiction. My
husband is a former minister with the Nancy Langford, The chairman of our Foothills
Presbytery Committee on Preparation for Ministry, Rev Dr B W Wilson, has sent
me a copy of the article, "Discernment and Development of Religious
Professions," in The ISTI Sun (David Richards et al,
January 1997). Dr Wilson's copy is
heavily marked up. I would like
permission to make copies for those preparing for ministry for whom I serve as
liaison. I would like to subscribe to
your newsletter and also be put on your mailing list for resource materials
and conferences. L C McArthur Jr,
I've read Restoring the Soul of a
Church and I'm very interested in learning more about ISTI. Would you please send information,
bibliographies, and suggestions as to how contributions may be made to your
organization. Les Longden,
Senior Pastor, Trinity United I live in Holly Pratz,
Colorado Springs CO I have to tell you how impressed I
am with the latest issue of The ISTI Sun. The articles by Elisabeth Horst and Stephen
Rossetti were both excellent. I hope
that church authorities begin to pay attention to the voices of healing in
their own ranks. Thank you again for
the very important work you and your colleagues are doing. Mike Lew, The
Next Step, Please keep up your wonderful work,
Roman, and add my name to your mailing list.
I plan to continue contributing.
God bless you and Peter Pichetti,
President, State Bank, Tower MN 218.753.6100 Greenhaven Press is a small
educational publisher of supplementary texts for high school and college
students. We are currently compiling
information for our book Child Sexual Abuse: At Issue….We can make it
better with input from ISTI. Nuria Coe,
Editoral Dept, Greenhaven Press, I serve as the Director of Clergy
Development for Metropolitan Community Churches. I am writing to request permission to copy
the article from The ISTI Sun, "Discernment and Development of
Religious Professionals," for the members of our Boards of Ordained
Ministry (BOMs). The BOMs are
responsible for the credentialing of clergy in our denomination and, I believe,
would benefit greatly from reading your article. Rev Maggie Tanis (MMTanis@aol.com) I've received the bibliography and was
truly impressed with the quality and volume of the references! Kudos to the ISTI staff who work on a topic
that is so relevant to my work as a mental health professional who brushes
from time to time with the power of the very political Church. I look forward to The ISTI Sun and
any forthcoming workshops that may be available. Yvonne Fallert, Please renew my subscription to The
ISTI Sun for the next three years.
As a clergy person and a treatment provider for convicted sex
offenders, I have found your newsletter well written and informative. Rev Robert
Gutleben Jr, Exec Clinical Dir, The Covenant Connection, What a surprise for me! You are keeping me from total despair. Your talk was the first time I heard
anyone, let along a Catholic priest, be open about the real issues, and understanding
of real people who are victims of abuse by clergy. Where did you come from? If ISTI is about what you say it is, keep
at it. Victims need you. Richard Dahlsen,
The work of ISTI is so important today
and we at Saint Luke's strongly support it.
We would like to offer this check of $250 as a token for our esteem
for ISTI. Rev Stephen
Rossetti PhD, President, Saint Luke Institute, Thank you for coming up to Karyn Walsh, The
Esther Trust, I have just begun to read Restoring
the Soul of a Church (ed Nancy Hopkins, Mark Laaser) and I already know
it will be a good read! I'm writing to
inquire about being on your mailing list and becoming a member. I am the director of Abuse Prevention for
the Christian Reformed Church in Beth Swagman,
Pastoral Ministries, Although I was glad to contribute to
the work of the sexual trauma work group last summer in Collegeville and to
suggest other resource people for your board, I regret I am unable to commit
more time because of other pressing academic and publishing priorities…. The institute certainly will be a very
important project and I wish you all success with it. Rachel Adler, Los Angeles CA 213.653.8679 It was good seeing you in Abbot Patrick
Moore OSB, Assumption Abbey, You are doing the Lord's work in
taking a message of hope and change to the far corners. You and ISTI have my highest respect. Judge Diana
Murphy, I've been a therapist in Dr William Hug,
Pastoral Counselor and Psychologist, Please send me 70 brochures for your
national conference, Desire: Spirituality and Sexuality. I will see to it that they go out in the
mailings to the Canadian Catholic Bishops, as I did last year. You people are doing a great service to the
Church and the CCCB needs to be kept informed of your conferences. By the way, you have a great website! Thanks for your leadership. Bede Hubbard,
Assistant General Secretary, CCCB, This was the first ISTI national
conference I participated in and really appreciated your hospitality,
organization, and thoughtfulness throughout the 3 days. The keynote speakers were right on
target. As a victim I found Ken A Victim, '99 national conference participant at Thank God for ISTI…a tremendously
great gift for the life of the Church. Bishop John
Kinney, Chair, National Catholic Bishop's Conference Committee on Clergy
Sexual Abuse As you know, Roman, I participated
in your conference workshop and very much appreciated your perspective on
institutional obstacles to change along with the opportunities for
growing. I will be talking with you
later on using your ideas for a project of the AGOS Group, for which we would
be willing to pay an intellectual property use fee. The (national) conference was
terrific. Thank you. Sharon Doty, The AGOS Group, What a wonderful (national)
conference. The speakers were great,
the hospitality was terrific, and the welcoming tone of your leadership
comments throughout the 3 days set the stage for relaxing but serious
discussions of difficult issues. Thank
you also for accommodating our special needs so graciously. Dr Liz Piasecki, Archdiocese of Milwaukee, WI
(piasecki@archmil.org I
attended the conference on boundaries in Anonymous I have nothing but respect for you
guys. You're doing tremendous work and
meeting a real need especially when many church leaders and institutions are
still very much on the defensive. Your
leadership example and openness is an inspiration to many, and I want to
support you in every way I can. I am
also very impressed with your conference presentations, Roman, that I've been a part of with you in Gary Schoener,
Founder and Executive Director, Walk-In Clinic, I have subscribed to your
newsletter. I am not a Catholic. I am a convicted pedophile who is now in
treatment. The negative attitudes, brutal
legal processes, prevent any meaningful progress towards creating healthy
communities. When I tried to change I
was treated as a criminal and continue to be today…. In any case you and ISTI are courageous in
taking a step to heal our community and world. I don't know how it will happen, but I know
nothing will happen if someone doesn't take a first step. John Groves, Just wanted to send a note to say
thanks for your newsletter. I look
forward to every issue. Even though I
can't afford to pay for it yet, please be patient with me. Your work is so needed and so little understood. It is reassuring that you are committed to
the healing process of sex abuse and the idea that environments can be
designed proactively safe.. Your
newsletter is a door, a window, a choice in the direction toward the light. Rebecca Borth, I've come to respect ISTI and I have
found healing there both through many of the workshops we attended and the
books and references I have purchased.
The articles available on the web are always helpful…. Victims, offenders and systemic change are
a part of the whole picture as painful as it is, all issues must be addressed
and help up in prayer and discernment.
Of course victims will be the most sensitive outwardly to any hinds of
minimilization, rejection, abandonment, censorship or frustration. Offenders can only improve their status by
being involved in ISTI, a way to repent and show the world that they have
worked hard to recover. Inwardly it
must be very painful for them. As much
as they need to be held accountable, and have been, they are victims of a
sick world too. They have needs and
limitations and it is vital to the bigger picture to understand what makes a
clergy or religious violate such a trusted position. Integrity is not perfection. A victim, Well, I'm back again. This was a wonderful conference and I'm
glad you were able to take care of our special group needs for housing. It worked out very nicely. ISTI is a terrific project and I hope you
realize what an enormous service you are providing, even just knowing you
exist! Thanks. I'll be back. Sr I appreciate very much your
willingness to shave a lot off the costs of the conference and room and meals
so that I could come again. That meant
a lot to me. As a victim still working
out a lot of issues, these conferences are a God-send. The talks and discussions are really good
but just being at Lyn Monnett, What a fine conference you put
on. I really liked the keynoters, all
three of them, and the workshops were great also. Thanks again, and if I can help in any way
in the future, definitely count me in! Nancy Beile, We are very
grateful for your help. You seem to be
the only one who has helped us and not pushed us away. Here is my sister in law's address she said
to feel free to send her anything that you think might help. Michael Millwood, After reviewing several programs
working with this sensitive issue (of clergy sexual abuse), I felt The
Interfaith Sexual Trauma Institute best addressed the problem. Antonio Saldana,
Editorial Board, The Press Gazette, Green Bay WI 920.496.1514 The comments about your keynote
address in Rev Hans Strub,
Director,Continuing Ministry Formation, Evangelisch-reformierte
Landes-Kirhe, I wished I could be with you, Abbot Timothy, for the
presentation of the ISTI citation of gratitude for your leadership. I still want to tell you how grateful I am
for your tenure as abbot. Your support
has been priceless to ISTI. Your humor
has been timely and your wisdom has been uncanny. Personally it was important to learn from
your leadership and experience your friendship. Dr Patrick
Carnes, The Meadows, The Interfaith Sexual Trauma
Institute Board acknowledges with the highest esteem and deepest appreciation
Abbot Timothy Kelly OSB, as a founder and charter member of ISTI. The Board is grateful for Abbot Timothy's
thoughtful counsel in the Board's emerging understanding of itself and its
mission. Abbot Timothy demonstrated
his priority commitment to ISTI and the work of systemic change by both his
regular participation in Board meetings and the significant annual financial
contribution of the ISTI Board
Citation of Appreciation, Thank you very much for your very
helpful phone consultations. You obviously
have a lot of experience to draw on and you are an especially gifted
listener. ISTI is a great pathfinder
for me and I'm sure, many others. Keep
at it! I am enclosing four gift
subscriptions to your newsletter and will be in touch soon about you visiting
the people we discussed to help them with their issues. Pam Farris,
Zachary LA 225.654.6192 I'm
thinking of you these days, especially in light of the impending KSTP report
on Friday. Having worked with you and
ISTI, I know the quality work you do, and I'm deeply disappointed in the
sensational reporting that the station is indulging in. Just wanted you to know that you have my
support and undying devotion, and prayers as well. Maureen Otremba, As per the ISTI conference in June (2000),…quite
frankly, I am hoping we can get a busload from Gerri Stowman,
Little Falls MN Donna's
letter (above) reminds us that ISTI is an important resource and does provide
help and facilitate healing. Testimonials like hers give us the confidence and
energy to overcome resistance to our organizational success and cause. Good
teamwork on our part is reflected in her words of thanks and gratitude. I am
thankful to be part of ISTI; I have learned much from my membership on the
Board. Richard Irons, MD, FASAM, Thanks,
Roman, for the permission to duplicate the article in the April issue of The
ISTI Sun by Dr Elisabeth Horst. I
really appreciate this! Last year, you
had sent me extra copies of the Forgiveness article by Ken Pat Horlocker I have benefited from your organization, particularly
from the book on Shame Healing (Elisabeth Horst). I suffer from PTSD and Bipolar. The
perpetrator of my sexual abuse was a female clergy…. I thought I would share
this poem with you and thank you for all you are doing to help people like
myself. Victim, Canada Dear
Roman, Just a few lines to say a very sincere “go raibh maith agat” thank you
for sending on The ISTI Sun. I
have just finished reading them all.
As we enter this phase of our life, as a Congregation, it is great to
have somebody ahead of us holding up a torch.
Keep up the great work. Rev P B Walsch CFC, Christian Brothers, …
The time since last year’s ISTI meeting (national conference) which helped me
so much has flown swiftly. This time
last year I was in Victim, Chaplain, I
attended ISTI’s 1999 annual conference in my capacity as a member of my
judicatory’s CSM intervention team.
There I received a copy of a handout Nancy Hopkins uses in church consultations
entitled “Talking and Listening,” a small group discussion guide. I have misplaced my copy and would like to
provide it to my colleagues. Could you
please send me another? The
Institute’s materials have been invaluable to our work. May God continue to bless your important
ministry. Ms Louise Rynd, We are an Orthodox monastic
community. We have seen the excellent material on your ISTI
website. We have been particularly inspired by the informative
articles. We are searching for professional
assistance in establishing a pro-active policy for preventing and/or
responding to allegations of abuse. Would you able to help us, or to
recommend some avenues we could peruse? I
have just finished reading the excellent book Restoring the Soul of a
Church. Reading this book was most
encouraging for me personally and I’ve bought books for members of our
group. I will be writing a review of
this book for a monthly Anglican paper sent to all the Anglican churches in
the diocese of Deacon Pattie Mutton, Sidney Australia I
had the opportunity to be on Sky Angel last week (June 7th) on the taped
segment of "Friends and Neighbors."
It will be aired all over the nation on July 3rd and will continue to
re-air. I am so pleased with this
interview. I was able to talk about
ISTI and where they are located and the mission of ISTI. I defined the words for the acronym and
expressed how much this organization brings education and insight to sexual
issues in the Church, and I specifically stated clergy abuse…. Ms Patricia Harris
interview on Sky Angel, evangelical national TV program for airing on I
want to thank you again for your generosity and hospitality. The (fourth annual ISTI national
conference, “Living Faith in a Sexually Traumatized Culture,”) was a
tremendous learning experience for me.
I hope to have a donation to ISTI on its way by next week… I've been
reading the "Standards of Sexual Ethics in Ministry" that recommend
each judicatory create its own ethics standard. Would you have any samples of such
standards that have been created that I could use as examples. This is an area the diocese needs to look
at and I want to have as much info available to enable the process. Ms
Bernadette Dunn, Director, Office of Christian Service, (Catholic) Chancery
Office,
The
national conference was just great! It
has been a wonderful experience for me in so many ways, education, networking
with participants, and a sense of hope in my own personal recovery; a great
feeling that I am not alone and that others really care, and there is help
out there for both victim and perpetrator.
Thank you also for my big fee reduction. A special note of gratitude for the ISTI
staff; each of you was special in making me feel welcome and important. Female
Victim, 2001 ISTI national conference participant, This
was a wonderful conference. It
exceeded my expectations. The
combination of ISTI Conference and the Female,
2001 ISTI national conference participant, I
attend many conferences and seminars in my professional work both as a
participant and as a speaker and I must say Male,
2001 ISTI national conference participant,
Thank you for a powerful weekend
(ISTI national conference). The speakers were outstanding; the setting,
beautiful; and the staff, attentive to our needs. Well organized. Well
done! ….Thank you so much for the 2001
ISTI Resource CD. I will share that also with Bishop Kristenson…. I have
been in touch with others already, soliciting information for our Canadian
church for training response teams and personnel. I still would
like to see greater representation from the Canadian scene or a stronger
presence of ISTI on this side of the border. Any ideas? Any suggestions for
how I might help? I continue to make your information available to our synod
and national bishops. I will certainly forward the
suggestions for policy development. There actually is a meeting September 6
reviewing and upgrading our policy for the Synod of Rev Dave
Saude, DMin, Pastoral Care, Thanks,
Roman, for all your great work in making the 2001 conference such a great
success. Last year's ISTI conference
and networking with other persons meant I was able to identity the resources
we shall use for this fall's training of all our 1200+ United Methodist
clergy of the Virginia Annual Conference regarding sexual ethics in pastoral
ministry. This year's networking to
say nothing of the great workshops and presentations was equally as
valuable. Thanks again for your very
valuable and significant ministry. Rev Rob Vaughn PhD, United The
ISTI conference and the setting of Wes Sharpe,
Roman, I just wanted to thank you for a great conference.
The presenters and themes were exceptional, and, as always,
the Spirit was so evident. Blessings on you and your good work,
and if there is any way I can be helpful let me know. Dr Mark Davies, Professor of Family
Ministries, Carey/Regent College,
I would like to order 12 reprints of the July 2001 ISTI SUN. I just now investigated your website. It is magnificent. I will explore it thoroughly ASAP and also share information about it with the religious/professional leaders I have been contacting. Thank you for your great work. Dr Marion M Horne,
Finding your website, articles, and resources, has truly
been a Godsend. I am a psychotherapist and pastoral counselor in Christine Homen, MSW, LICSW,
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